Who you are vs them!

A lot of times we forget ourselves while remembering everyone else and their feelings. Often, we put too much consideration into what other’s perception of us may be. No one is perfect and everyone has a past; remember a saint was once a sinner who is saved by grace. Even if we’ve done some (frowned upon) things in our past, doesn’t mean we are entitled to settle or accept anyone’s mess. People seem to forget that we are not our actions or our past, if we’ve decided to change or grow for the better good. With enough love, self-evaluations, determination and being able to identify who we are individually; instead of focusing on what people want us to be. Changing who you are based on other’s actions will only hinder you, remember you never have to settle just because someone isn’t comfortable with who you are. Instead, focus on being the best individual you can me.


I can relate when it comes to being judge and judging others, being condemned for past mistakes or even current bad decisions is an uncomfortable feeling. It is always better to forgive and forget instead of dwell. The past cannot be changed however it can be learned from. For instance, I have experienced everything from being way too nice to simply and being taken advantage of; Time has taught me that I do not have to change the type of person I am, however I desperately need to change the type of people I use to associate myself with. Why should I make my heart empty or cold? Why should I remain out of character because of one or a few individuals? Me changing who I am will not fix who they are? If I watch one bad movie, yes; I’ve wasted my time but that’s not going to stop me from ever seeing another movie again. Same concept with dealing with people, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me… yall know the rest..


So, the next time someone acts as if your obligated to tolerate their setbacks, remind yourself; You deserve to be treated how you treat others. Why should you accept less? Know the difference between a giver and a taker, a user and an abuser. You deserve happiness and that comes before anyone else’s, unless it’s the lord or your children/child.


Learn the difference between friends that just want to sit at the table and the ones who is willing to bring something to it. If helping someone else get what they want or need is taking from you, just think to yourself; would they do the same for me? Remember love yourself first and remember a mess will only attract another mess. Define who you are and what you’re and the rest will follow.